It is surely most little girl's dream to be Baby in Dirty Dancing, not just because she overcomes her biggest fears to become an amazing dancer, but also because she gets her man! And not just any man - the man of her dreams. Now I am fulfilling my every fantasy in doing "The Lift". I must have watched that film 200 times. I have dreamed and dreamed that I could be Baby (or have her life) so many times. It is my ultimate film and now I am getting to do a tiny part of it and feel what it's like. I cannot tell you how happy that makes me.
Now all I need is to find the man of my dreams (who can also dance), take up dancing professionally myself (or even just for fun) and dance with him; slowly stripping each other off so that I end up dancing pressed up against his bare chest (like Baby and Jonny in the film). THAT is my biggest fantasy (bigger than the one about having sex whilst having a tattoo!). Can you even imagine the joy of being in love with someone and slow dancing to a sexy song whilst peeling each other's clothes off. That scene of them doing just that in the film is still one of my all-time favourite sexy scenes in a film (along with most of the film "Sliver", the shagging up against a wall scene in "8 Mile" and the scene in "Brokeback Mountain" where he spits on his hand in the tent before you know what). Every time I watch the scene in DD it sends goosebumps and shivers around my whole body. I ache to feel that passion and love for someone. I know that right now I don't want a bloke but of course eventually I do want to be madly in love with someone! Even if it's only for a week; I want to feel that warmth in my heart and feel like I'm going to burst with love. Most people want that at some point though I guess. Unless you really do prefer your own company?! We all want to love and be loved. Love after all is the best thing in the whole world.
And as the ultra-cool and extremely wise Emily says in her book: ".....And then there's the other common mistake people make. Rather than wanting a relationship, they just want that flippy feeling in their stomach, because they're in love with love. They crave the chemical high from the oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins that race around the body, rather than actually loving the person they're claiming to want to spend the rest of their life with. And who can blame them? Love really is wonderful. If it weren't so brilliant there wouldn't be so many songs, books and paintings about it, so it's no wonder we try to experience it as mush as we can......"
You see - it's normal to crave love. Reading her book made me realise that, and also confirmed to me that I'm not a weirdo romantic freak who day-dreams far too mush about being in love! Perhaps that's why I fall in love so mush (after all, for the first two weeks of any new relationship I'm convinced he's The One!)?! Ha ha. I am a true romantic at heart and ONE day I will find a man to dance shirtless with me in candle-light (and hopefully it will be one who has a body as good as Patrick Swayze). The closest I ever came to that was when I walked into Antony Costa's house drunk one night to be greeted by him in a tux, a candle-lit lounge and romantic music playing on the stereo. I'd just finished a P.A in a nightclub and had been dropped at his house. If I hadn't been so drunk (and wearing fishnet stockings and hot-pants) then it might have had slightly more impact on me. We swayed around for a bit and then I dragged him upstairs. Actually, I don't think we even made it up the stairs! Ha ha. Sorry - fllth. Anyway, my point to all this is that I can't even describe to you how amazing it is to have done that lift today. Dirty Dancing really is favourite film and I CANNOT believe I am doing the biggest lift of the film. I mean, it might all go terribly wrong on the night but we did it perfectly today and that alone is enough for me. To know that I have mastered the thing that took Baby days to learn (ha ha - I know it's not real and only a film but to me Dirty Dancing is true and real and Baby and Jonny have 7 kids now and live in a beautiful mansion house where they do dance shows and lessons to make money) is truly all my dreams come true!
I've said it before (in fact I say it every time I fulfil an ambition) but I might as well kill myself cos there's nothing left I wanna do in life. Ha ha. I've met Paul, Weller, Valentino Rossi, Van Morrison, Chuck Berry, Robbie Williams and Jamie Foxx (so basically nearly ALL my idols). I've jumped out of a plane, I've got a motorbike licence, I've bungee-jumped and abseiled down CentrePoint. I've been on the back of Ron Haslam's bike round Donington doing wheelies at 200mph and I've overcome my fear of spiders and needles (well, kind of - more about that later). I've been to Barbados, Australia, New Zealand and a million other places. I've been 'in love' a million times and had my heart broken (a few times now). I've been in pop videos, been in a film, been on the front of papers and magazines and I've been voted one of the 100 sexiest women in the world (the WHOLE world - yes Jodie - Get in! I still love that particular achievement - especially for the fact that I was the 'ugly kid' at school according to all the hideous kids I went to school with) I've swam with dolphins and turtles and I've laid across a fully grown tiger for a photo-shoot. I've held penguins, koalas, a honey-bear, lemurs and Meer cats and watched Polar Bears swimming under water from 2 feet away. I've been on the biggest theme park ride in the world and at 26 I bought my own house (which I think is a good achievement). Now I have done 'The Lift' from Dirty Dancing and I really am having the time of my life (sorry I didn't mean to reference the film again there but it's the only way to describe how I'm feeling). This one is going down in my memory bank as one of the best and most satisfying things I've ever done. I am soooooooooooo chuffed! I'm sitting here smiling to myself as I type this.
My God, I wish I had a way of thanking Vanessa and Ben and Channel 5 (and all the crew) for giving me this opportunity; a way that would make them feel as good as I do for being given the chance to do this. I know I sound like a mad woman but it means so mush to me!!
So - just going back to my needle and spider phobia (cos I was talking about it with my driver this morning). In talking to him I realised just how mush my friend Kate Marlow (life coach & therapist) helped me with it. A few years ago I definitely couldn't have an injection and I couldn't even look at a spider on TV, let alone sit in a room with one. Now though I can have an injection (if I focus really hard!) and I can even pick up a spider, with a glass and piece of paper, to put it outside! Wow! That's quite amazing really; considering all she did was talk to me! My driver was saying that he has the same two phobias and he was really impressed that I have managed to overcome them (to a degree). I think it's great that I no longer turn into a crying wreck when I need an injection and it's also great that I can actually sleep in my own house at night (without hysterically phoning my dad to come and remove an 8-legged beast). I did laugh though during the same conversation with the driver cos it reminded me that yesterday Kyle said "That wolf is still in the bath! He's got a shower cap on and is scrubbing his back!" I must have laughed for a solid hour. The "wolf" he was talking about was a spider the size of my hand. Because I live in the countryside, I get the BIGGEST spiders ever. They're the giant-bodied furry ones (that may as well be tarantulas). I love the thought of "the wolf" scrubbing his back wearing a shower cap. He has taken over my bathroom anyway cos no one will go in there til I move it!
Now changing the subject again; it was my friend Emily who gave me the inspiration to carry on writing my book. She's such a great writer and she's written so many best-sellers that when I suddenly got writer's block half-way through the book; I called her for help. She turned up at my house and gave me the first opening line to my book " So there I was: naked, screaming and covered in a thick, gooey substance..." after that my writing flowed like never before! I will be forever grateful to her for that; for helping me and for rushing over the way she did. I even had Chicken Pox at the time and she risked her own health to sit with me and read some of the stuff I'd already written! She is a true angel sent from above!! She's amazing. Again, for the record - you can buy her newest book "I'd Rather Be Single than Settle" from www.fusionpress.co.uk - it's AMAZING! It certainly sorted my head out and opened my mind to a whole new world of possibilities!! Of course other than craving a man to dance half-naked with in the glow of a candle in a log cabin in the middle of nowhere (and I WILL get that one day); I'm actually happy to be single after reading it!! Result!
I gotta go now - I have been for a coffee with my mate Gary (who is traipsing round Lakeside right now trying to find me a new battery charger for my camera) and Lauren has just arrived at mine. I might write again later cos she won't be staying long and on a dark lonely night I am better off writing than texting a wrong-un to come over for some company! Ha ha.
Loads of love and happiness
Jodie
xxxx
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