Oh my oh my oh my....... Is it normal to hurt this much? My whole body feels like it's on fire! Every time I sit down it freezes up and it takes me 5 minutes to get up again! This gym lark is painful! I think I am at the height of the aches right now. I can't even get comfy lying down! Me and Jenna are killing it with the gym! We are doing 45 mins of cardio, half an hour of stomach and floor stuff, half an hour of weights, ten minutes of rock-climbing, ten minutes on the leg and bum machines, stretching out at the end and then going for a swim. It's full on. We are gym beasts!!!!! We can't get enough and we don't feel satisfied unless we walk out dripping in sweat and panting with weak shaky legs! Ha ha. We look BOOTIFUL when we finish. Puffing red faces (not a scrap of make-up) and clothes stuck to our sweaty bodies! Nice. On top of the effort being made I am having to put up with teenage boys shouting my name at me while I train (thank you - as if I had forgotten my own name!). It will all be worth it though Marsh! It will all be worth it...........
I am still as determined as ever to get FIT. Fitter than fit! So fit that I can jump up and down on my trampoline naked without ANYTHING moving! Ha ha. i'm loving it. I am still also sticking to my weekly diet of nothing but fruit, salad and veg (with junk food allowed at the weekend). I'm a girl on a mission! You know what though? I feel so much better already. Not that I felt crap to begin with but I feel healthier and more on the ball. The gym has also taken my mind off men (result!). By the time I get home each day (after working and then gym) I'm too knackered to even satisfy myself (let alone have a bloke do it for me!). I am still chatting dirtily away with MSN boy for kicks but I reckon that even if he was in this country then I wouldn't have the energy to see him! ha ha. That's a first! Jodie Marsh DOESN'T want to see a fit man. Would you ever have believed it? Don't get me wrong - he's absolutely beautiful (jaw-droppingly so) and any girl would give their right arm to be with him but I'm just happy to be on my own at the moment. I'm so achey and tired and focused that I wouldn't be able to devote any quality time to a man anyway. I'm mega busy with work (new book and TV show coming out soon) and I'm running round all over the place with other things too.
I might feel differently by next week (when the aches and pains wear off and I have energy again) but for now I'm happy to collapse into bed every night on my own. I did have an offer of some "fun" from a fit bloke the other day actually and I did get a slight excited tingle. I thought about it for a minute (and how nice it would be) and then declined when I realised that I just don't need anything casual and I certainly don't want true love (as if that exists for me anyway! ha ha). The only thing I love at the moment (apart from myself of course) is the gym. The gym is my new boyfriend who I have become obsessed with and who I want to see every day!
After the gym today, me and Jenna went to see Carolina and then I went for dinner with Jordan and Tony Trumpet. I then came home to do my receipts for mummy (well, for mummy to pass onto the tax man actually) and then I went back into Brentwood to pick them up when the pub shut. Jordan has helped me finish off my receipts (he was a little bit tipsy so it was really funny - he just made me cry laughing!) and I am going to bed as soon as I finish writing this. Bed has become something I can't wait to get in. Normally I have insomnia and I dread going to bed cos it means lying there for hours watching crap TV or reading a book. Now that I am training though; I fall asleep the minute my head hits the pillow! It's great! I would highly recommend the gym (and a hard work-out) to anyone who suffers from insomnia or to anyone who needs to "Get a Life!" My mind was consumed with thoughts of men til I started at the gym. Now you couldn't pay me to go near one with a barge pole!
Having friends to go with also really helps. They motivate you to keep going. Like I said before, my mate Steve shouts at me to do "another ten minutes" just as I'm about to fall off the cross-trainer with exhaustion and because I love a challenge (and don't want to lose face); I carry on regardless of the fact that my legs are shaking and I feel like I'm going to vomit! Ha ha. I am seriously looking forward to the day when I stop aching though and when I really start to see a difference. It's only been a week and already Jenna has lost 7 pounds and my stomach is mush flatter and my biceps are starting to show (they now look like little hard mounds instead of old women's bingo wings). I didn't weigh myself before I started cos I'm not doing it to lose weight - I'm just doing it to tone up and get some definition back in my body. Tomorrow we have decided that we should take some naked pictures of each other (for our viewing only) and then take some more in a month's time cos if we can SEE the difference with our own eyes then it will force us to carry on!
Sorry, I know it's probably a bit boring - all this gym talk. You probably want to hear me talk about the men in my life (or want to hear me gossip or rant) but unfortunately I just can't tell you anything more. There are no men (thank God!), I can't tell you anything about work (cos it's all top secret - though I can tell you I'm very excited and happy) and I don't have anything to rant about. Life is breezing along very nicely. In fact it's moving very quickly. I can't believe it has been a week already since we started at the gym! I suppose it's cos I've got so mush on at the moment that I don't have time to sit around and think about things. I'm just trying to keep up with my own crazy life! I've created this insane schedule, now I have to live with it, try and stay alert, work my arse off and fall into bed every night a tired, aching wreck. Better than sitting around doing nothing though!!!!
I suppose I CAN chat about men for a little while (oh go on then - you've twisted my arm!). I mean, not that there's anyone except MSN boy but I can talk about him if you like. What do you wanna know? He's painfully fit (with a naughty glint in his eye - like me!), he's got a retina-burningly handsome face and an out-of-this-world 6-pack. He's funny, intelligent, caring, misunderstood (also like me) and he's rude as hell (we talk about sex ALL night). Sounds like my perfect man eh? Don't count on it! ha ha. He'll be gone by next week; I just know it. The ones that sound too good to be true end up lasting less time than the ones who are dicks from the start!!! At least if they're a dick from the start then I have something to work with! ha ha. If they are perfect then either I act like a twat and scare them away (cos I'm nervous around such a perfect Godly specimen) or they are too mush of a player (simply because they have it all and could have any girl they want). Either way it doesn't look good does it? ha ha. The conclusion is that a perfect man is NOT the perfect man for me. I need someone with no brain, style, mind of his own or personality; who thinks I am the best girl in the whole world (and would therefore NEVER risk losing me - I might not be fully satisfied but at least I'll trust him!) ha ha ha ha ha ha. Jeez - I'm actually worried that I might never trust a man again! Is that a bad thing? I'm not sure. It's bad cos I risk constantly having barriers up and never finding true love (if that's even what I want) but then I suppose it's a good thing cos it means I can never get hurt (not for longer than the one day it takes me to get over the dented pride anyway). Oh - who cares?! I don't. I'm living for myself now. I don't want another man moving into my house and putting his toothbrush in my toothbrush holder (and worse; trying to put dead animals in my fridge!). The minute a man tries to put "meat" (as it's more commonly known) in my fridge (which, for some reason they all try and do) - I go right off him!!!!!! My brother actually pointed this out to me a few weeks ago. He said "do you realise that the minute you dump a man is when they put meat in your fridge!" I laughed out loud. I hadn't even thought about it. The thing is; they don't even ask if they can. If they asked, I'd say "no" but suddenly one day I come home from work (normally about 3 weeks into the relationship) to find a bit of dead pig in my fridge and I freak out (not to their face of course - I call Lauren or Jordan and start screaming down the phone that he "needs to go!"). Jordan is very right though. I can't handle people treating my house like it's their own. I never ask them to move in with me; they just take it upon themselves to move in on the sly (probably hoping I won't notice). One day I'm telling them "don't fall in love with me cos I'll break your heart" and I'm having a "bit of fun" with what I think is a nice bloke, and the next I wake up and notice that their whole wardrobe is on my bedroom floor, my en-suite bathroom (which is for ME and me alone - there's another one for other people) is suddenly full of "men's things" and my fridge has dead animals in it! Aaaarrrrrrgh!!!!!!! Help me! I don't want it!!!! It's MY house and I want it to stay that way. If I "fall in love" and beg someone to move in then fair play - he can bring whatever he wants here (apart from dead animals) and he can treat the place like his own but unless it comes to that I do NOT want to go in my bathroom to have a shower and find razors plugged in to the wall and beard trimmings in my sink!!!!! When will they learn??? All of the above is why I am staying away from men too (as well as the gym killing me, I mean).
So; I had better go to bed. It's late and I'm tired and Paddy is looking at me with a sad face like he needs some cuddles and head-rubs. Lyla is happily chewing away at a toy on the rug! I hope you are having a good week. I am!!!!
If you are feeling a bit low then either join a gym or chat dirty to someone on MSN (even if you don't fancy them - it'll cheer you up and make you laugh!).
Loads and loads of love Jodie x x x x
P.S Quote for the day: "Do you love me because I'm beautiful, or am I am beautiful because you love me?"
P.P.S my Myspace is www.myspace.com/youwishiwasyourbird - check it out! Pics, videos and silly blogs!!!!!!
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